January 14, 2016 (1/3)
A friend came over on January 3. She had wanted to talk to me for weeks and not via text. Looking back now, I probably had unconsciously avoided connecting for a while. This woman works diligently across the board to live a healthy life and yet also has struggled for years with various ongoing health issues. Frustrated, she was looking at everything within her body with the same questions I was considering about how all this work is not enough to feel amazing. Her path had led her to research silicone breast implants, something we both had in common. While listening to her talk, it hit me like a lightening bolt. How is it that I pay attention to literally everything I put in my body and yet I had completely overlooked the fact that nearly 8 years ago I elected to have silicone implants put in my body after my preventive double mastectomy? I remember asking questions about alternatives then but did not have my voice fully accessed to stand up for myself or even quite frankly do the research I would do today about a new vitamin I was going to take. I now treat my body like a temple and yet I had closed a door to a room filled with rubbish while maniacally cleaning the other spaces on my hands and knees. It was time to open the door and consider cleaning out that dark corner. If I had made a point of only eating organic foods and avoiding toxic substances in my body, there was perhaps something to this for me. I had endless questions shooting through my mind. I started doing research immediately and vowed to call my surgeon the next morning.